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OMG! It’s snowed like a mother over here! Danny and Jon were separated this entire weekend but we still managed to pull a brand new edition of the J and D Show for you!

We made our Superbowl XLIV wager but we didn’t name a punishment. Leave us comments on how the loser will pay for it on next week’s episode.

*EDIT* The New Orleans Saints have won Superbowl XLIV by 2 TDs! That’s exactly the spread Jon predicted on this episode… go ahead and leave us some good suggestions on what Danny’s punishment should be. If we choose your idea, we’ll send you a prize.

I was going to write this blog post tomorrow (Friday) but since the DC area is about to become snowed in for the entire week, I decided to do it today. I could do it at home over the weekend but I’ll be too busy playing video games and drinking beers whilst in my boxers. Anyways, I just wanted to give you my prediction for the Superbowl. Colts 31  Saints 30.  I’ll be rooting for the Saints  just like most people outside of Indianapolis. But I just can’t see Peyton Manning losing this game. His oreo cookie licking skills have convinced me that he is a machine and that he can’t lose in anything except for in a "who has a smaller forehead?" contest.

I guess I’ll be a part of the Who Dat Nation on sunday. If you didn’t know, "Who Dat" is a term used by Saints fans which is short for the team chant of "Who dat say dem gonna beat dem Saints?!"(the horrible grammar is due to the Louisiana Bayou – go ask Gambit about that). The Redskins use "Hail to the Redskins" which led them to a 4-12 record. So I think Who Dat wins. However, I can’t help but chuckle whenever I hear Saints fans chant "Who Dat" because I always imagine a Vietnamese person saying it. Now you imagine it: "Who Dat?!"…see? isn’t that funny? Vietnamese servers say "Who Dat?!" all the time. When a Vietnamese server brings out your pho and is not sure who it belongs to, he will ask "Who dat laaj numba fo-tee no cilantro?" And then I will say "That’s me." And then he will ask "Who dat sping rowe?" And then I will say "That’s for everyone at the table." And then he will ask "Hah?! Who dat?!" And then I will say "Nevermind, thank you." The end.

Be safe if you’re in the area. Happy snow day and eat your vitamins.

Danny and I just flew back from Las Vegas (and boy are our arms tired!). Little did we know that on the very same weekend, Douglas Hines unveiled his new invention- a sex robot named Roxxxy (CNN Article). Supposedly, this thing is the bees-knees. It’s apparently very life-like in the feel of the synthetic skin and it can even hold a conversation (no chance it knows anything about sports). People will undoubtedly make jokes about how Roxxxy is the perfect woman because it won’t nag and if it does you can just pull the plug. Unfortunately for all the horny toads out there, Roxxxy McDonald costs a whopping $7,000! (I gave her that last name because she resemebles Ronald McDonald -shudders-). While this is interesting and all, I fear that Douglas Hines may have targeted his product to a specific demographic, which is caucasian men <rracistt!>. This is fine by me since I would never buy a sex robot, ever, but if I did- hmmm… I would have to make modifications for it to appeal to the Asian persuasion.

First of all, change the name. I get the whole ‘xxx’ concept but Roxy is definitely the name of a white trash diner waitress. How about ”iPAL”? It’s not a very sexy name but I think Asian guys are more likely to approach a non-threatening girl. We get intimidated since we are the bottom of the totem pole as far as desirable men go… we beat only Indian guys, though Jay Sean is ruining things for us. 

The next tweak I’m making is to change the dynamics of this thing. Roxxxy McDonald stands at 5′7 and weighs in at 120 lbs. This means most Asian men will find Roxxxy McNugget a little cumbersome. iPAL will need to be 5′3 and weigh 110 lbs MAX. Don’t call me shallow, I know this is like the average size of all those K-Pop girls. We need to make sure iPAL is anatomically correct and give her short legs and large head. The texture of her hair is going to be a lot thicker than that of Roxxxy McNasty. You might need to spend time straightening iPAL’s hair for 30 minutes each morning. The silicon skin will need to be tinted with yellow/tan and yet remain pale and pastey because apparently being dark is a sign that you are lower class and poor to other Asians.

Lastly, I need to modify the voice. While Roxxxy will probably have a deep sexy voice, that doesn’t do jack for me. iPAL needs to have a higher pitched, nasaly/whiny voice while pouting. Is this attractive? Zero chance! But we need to make sure iPAL stays true to real Asian girls.

Though I struggled greatly in Physics and Chemistry and I could never invent something so advanced, I believe I have the blueprint here to cover the marketshare of K-Girl robots. You can see what iPAL will look like when I am completed. I will start the bidding at $10,000! Douglas Hines, iPAL pwns Roxxxy McIntosh… now stop being such a creepy dude and invent something useful.

Jon and Danny are back from their Vegas trip. It’s a good thing we recorded this episode prior to leaving because we are dead and gone today.

Michelle joined the J and D Show.com and on this episode you will meet her as we conduct our phone interview with her. She actually came to meet us on our way back from Las Vegas and just as we predicted, she’s not fat! Voices are dead giveaways when guessing girls’ weights just as a person’s race is a dead giveaway when guessing manhood size. We talk a little about Greg Oden’s not-so-little member in the leaked photograph from last week.

The Superbowl is this week so we’re getting excited for the big showdown between the Colts and Saints- so much so that we are in a singing mood… but you will only enjoy that if you listen to the entire show. Spread the word on the show because we are too lazy to spread it ourselves.

Everyone meet Michelle! She’s a Korean-Pop blogger for seoulbeats.com and now she has joined the J and D Show as our female perspective and resident K-Pop expert for all of you who are into that sorta thing.

She is a lovely young lady from San Jose, California and she somehow gets our humor!

As Jon and Danny are going to be on their Las Vegas trip for the rest of the week, Michelle has provided an intro blog post for all of you out there. Show her some love because she deserves it.

You guys can check out a quick intro interview with Michelle in the upcoming episode as well.

Michelle, take it away! (She won our hearts with this blog post!)

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Why girls should listen to J&D show

Hi, I’m a Korean-American girl, and I like the J and D Show. Apparently the guys think I am an anomaly, but I don’t agree with them. How can girls, especially K-girls, not find them funny? I’m here to give some reasons why females should start tuning into the J and D Show, if you ladies aren’t already.

1. Funny pop culture commentary from an Asian-American perspective.
There are a lot of podcasts that have hilarious guys shoot the shit, but J and D give a different point of view – a slightly more squinty one. They are not hesitant to make fun of blacks, whites, Asians, especially Koreans, and not least, themselves. They talk about things like the compulsion of Asian girls to take pictures of their food when they go out, why Avatar is unintentionally hilarious, and what spam is made of (90% pig shoulder, 10% sphincter).

2. J and D are lovable and entertaining.
Jon and Danny pretty much have the exact amount of wit and niceness that makes someone funny. Not pretentious, just fun to listen to. Hun-joon, the wisest guy that J and D know, also adds into the mix with his straight man-esque role.

3. They give an example of what normal guys talk about.
Okay, the previous two points are not necessarily good reasons why girls should listen to the show, but this one is: they provide more insight on how guys think, especially with topics like “why girls aren’t funny,” or “how girls can get a boyfriend.” They may or may not be right, but if you aren’t friends with guys or don’t have males surrounding you, this is what they might sound like.

4. (if you are Korean) They make hilarious K-jokes.
My ice cubes smell like mackerel, I have moo-dari, and my mom always cuts Korean pears after dinner. They also throw in K-pop references in once in awhile.

5. (if you are me) The show helps bring sleep.
It’s like having my brother or friends talking in the background, but funnier.

-Michelle