after a few delays in pre-production for "spider-man 4" with the original cast and crew, sony pictures decided to re-launch the entire spider-man film series. that means they will make a completely new spider-man movie that is separate from the 3 previous films starring tobey maguire (like how they did it with "batman begins"). the new spider-man movie, which will focus on spidey’s origins, is due out in 2012. i like the idea. although it had the best dance sequence i’ve ever seen (peter parker disco dancing in the streets of nyc), "spider-man 3" kind of ruined the series for me. they really screwed up the venom character and relied way too much on cgi and cool tricks instead of focusing on the story. plus, tobey maguire’s face aged about 23 years from the first movie to the third. and i was also sick of seeing close-ups of kirsten dunst aka snaggle-tooth. so i think it’s good that sony is re-doing the whole thing. if i had to pick the new actors and actresses to play the main characters in the new spider-man movie, it would be:
zac efron as peter parker/spider-man. this isn’t even close. zac efron is freaking gorgeous. peter parker is in high school so zac is young enough to be believable as a highschool student. peter parker is also a nerd and zac’s range as an actor is limitless so he can play any type of character he wants. he’s also buff enough to look sexy in blue and red spandex (have you seen those pics of him on the beach with vanessa hudgens?!). and he’s popular enough to draw zillions of horny girls to watch the movie. easy call. *other potential candidate: robert pattinson. but he’s too pale, too british, and too edward.
dianne argon as mary jane watson: if you don’t know, you better akz somebody. dianne argon plays the fabulous quinn fabray in "glee." mary jane watson is in her highschool drama team and is an aspiring theater actress. so whoever plays the part of mary jane must be able to sing and dance. who better to play the part of mj than quinn fabray?! plus, she’s about 50 billion times hotter than kirsten dunst. all you have to do is dye her hair red and voila! mary jane watson is born. *other potential candidate: blake lively. i wouldn’t mind this at all.
james franco as harry osborn. james franco is the only actor from the other spider-man movies i would keep for the new movie. he’s so goofy and played the part so well that i couldn’t think of any other actors to take his place. and even though he would look about 12 years older than everyone else, no one can deliver the line "i swear on my father’s grave, spider-man will pay!" better than he can. *other potential candidate: new york jets quarterback mark sanchez. i have no idea why but he looks like he could be a good harry osborn. raaaandom.
diane lane as aunt may. i don’t know why aunt may has to be perceived as an elderly woman. peter parker is in highschool. let’s say he’s 17. are you to believe that his aunt is really 78 years old? if they were alive, i’m guessing peter parker’s parents would be around 45 years old. there can’t be a 30 year difference between his parents and his aunt, right? so i want aunt may to be in her mid 40’s. and diane lane is the hottest cougar/milf ever. so let’s have more eye candy and less senior citizens for this new spider-man movie. *other potential candidate: the actress who plays angela from "the office." she’s just ok in terms of older lady looks but she definitely looks like someone’s aunt.
vince vaughn as the green goblin. i’m not sure who the villain will be in the new movie but if its the green goblin, i’d pick vince vaughn just because they both have similar creepy laughs. i think they made the green goblin a little too serious in the first movie. he needs to be able to crack witty jokes with spider-man as they fight. and vince vaughn is perfect for that. he needs to lose a few lbs though. i’m not sure the goblin’s glider would be able to support him. *other potential candidate: luke wilson. just because i’d like to throw him a bone. i feel bad for him. these at&t commercials are really screwing up his acting career. but he does need to lose a few lbs in the face. i’m not sure goblin’s mask would fit him.
what do you think?
It sounds like you want Spiderman 4 to be a comedy, and I’m okay with that. The cartoon was pretty hilarious. Maybe they should get Michael Cera to be Spiderman; he would get the awkward teenage thing down.
And as a side note: can you and Jon PLEASE caps proper nouns and the beginning of sentences. It would be easier to read. Thank you.
Hi Michelle. Michael Cera would be such an awkward Peter Parker. I like it. Also, I will try to start using caps correctly. Like I am doing now. But as I am typing this, I am realizing why I don’t use caps in the first place. It’s because I am too lazy to move my pinkie over to press Shift while simultaneously pressing another key. It’s just way too hard and I have to do it way too many times. But for you, Michelle, I will try my best.
iS IT JUST ME OR IS mICHAEL cERA THE SAME CHARACTER IN EVERY FLICK. jUST LIKE bEN sTILLER IS ALWAYS THE SAME TOO. I THINK ITS PRETTY ANNOYING BUT OH WELL…
^I’ll give you points for trying Jon. And thanks Danny!
I can’t get over how you called Zefron sexy. *side eye* He’s gonna be just as chubby as Luke and Vince in a dozen or-so years. But hey, if short elfin dudes strike your fancy, go for it!